(Knox) -- When I moved to Knoxville 10 years ago, my mentor said to me, "Kara, it's not the cost of living in Knoxville that will get you. It's the cost of giving."
While that didn't make complete sense to me at the time, it's only now that I'm starting to realize what he meant.
Sure, financial giving can become burdensome to the pocketbook, but I believe it's the giving of one's time that can become a much larger issue when not properly managed.
Which brings me to the topic of why prioritizing your extracurricular community calendar is so important.
At one point during my career in local television, I was serving on six local nonprofit committees. When I eventually left the industry to pursue a consulting career, I expected the community requests would subside, but I was wrong. In fact, I joke with friends that when the word got out in town that I'd now be managing my own time, the requests substantially increased.
'Interests and availability change'
It can be extremely difficult and nerve-wracking to turn down opportunities to serve. Whether it be self-imposed guilt or the desire to maintain one's good name, refusing an opportunity to give of one's time is downright hard. I think this can be especially true for women.
Not only is it difficult to turn down a new request but it's equally challenging to step down from a committee or board role that you've served on for years. However, remember interests and availability change and when we overextend our calendars, we're not only hurting ourselves but also the organization we're supposed to be serving.
I know for a fact that our local nonprofits would much rather have an engaged committee member or someone who can attend meetings with regularity and advocate for their organization versus someone who's simply there because they were too embarrassed or guilt-ridden to turn down yet another offer.
'No' is a full sentence
My entrepreneur father finally offered the advice that allowed me to stop beating myself up.
He said, "Remember Kara, the word 'no' is a full sentence." And he's right. When it comes to making decisions that are right for you and your family, you don't have to make excuses or provide an itemized list of reasons for saying "no."
And that goes for both new opportunities and existing commitments. Say "yes" only when you can serve in a way that represents the very best version of yourself. And remember, just because you've stepped down from a leadership role within an organization doesn't mean you have to stop advocating for them. Find time to attend one of their fundraising events, continue financial support if you're able or simply share their social media posts online.
Marie Kondo your community calendar
By stepping down, you're also allowing room for new blood to step into a leadership role and experience the joys of giving back.
After all, as my mother always says, that's what we were put on this earth to do, to give back.
So how do you make those hard decisions?
Simple. Apply the techniques offered by lifestyle sensation Marie Kondo, author of "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing." I encourage my fellow servant leaders to take her advice for tidying up and apply it to their community activity calendars. Take inventory of your extracurricular activities and decide which truly "spark joy" in your life.
Once you've prioritized, graciously bid your goodbyes to any remaining commitments.
By freeing up your calendar to include only those activities that truly spark joy in your life, you'll find that you have more time for your family and your career, and bonus, will be a more effective leader within the organizations you've decided to serve.
